Understanding Grief: A Journey Through Loss and Healing With a Touch of Floral Support
Sadness. Confusion. Anger. Fear. These are just a few of the feelings that someone who is grieving over the loss of a loved one will experience.
How people grieve, though, is individual and unique to their own situation. Anyone who has lost someone near and dear to them has experienced grief, and the roller coaster emotional ride that goes along with it. When a loved one passes away, there’s an overwhelming sense of loss, and possibly confusion and anger if the death was unexpected.
Knowing and recognizing the different stages of grief can help a person cope with their feelings and know that there is hope on the other side, and that only the passage of time will help them to heal and carry on with their lives. Oftentimes, a person just needs to come to the realization that the feelings they are experiencing are quite normal and are expected throughout the grieving process.
Helping someone through their loss
If you are reading this and have recently lost a loved one, please accept our condolences. Accepting the death of a loved one is quite difficult and hard to understand at times. It’s okay to be angry or hurt and confused. And it’s okay to grieve in your very own way.
Whether you’ve lost a family member, a close friend, or a co-worker, there is always an overwhelming sense of loss that comes after a death. Those left behind feel an immediate void and emptiness that will only begin to heal with the passage of time.
If you’re a friend of someone who has experienced a death in their family, you can sometimes feel helpless, and not know what to do or say to help your friend. But sometimes, a simple hug or a beautiful plant or flower arrangement that reminds them of their loved one can be a welcome gesture of friendship and love.
What type of plant or flower you send should be based on your relationship to the person who is grieving. For instance, if your best friend’s father has passed, consider sending a colourful plant that bears some special meaning for them.
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What’s the right flower or plant to send?
There isn’t really a right or wrong answer to this question, but oftentimes, people struggle and wonder what type of plant or flower will have an impact on a person and lift their spirits.
Don’t automatically count out bright and vibrant arrangements. Through the years, funeral flowers and sympathy plants have evolved and it’s not uncommon to see a beautiful, vivid arrangement of purples, reds and yellows at a funeral.
Before you determine what flowers or plant to send, consider the personalities involved. If this person is a dynamic and outgoing person, then you can reflect that with bright and beautifully coloured arrangements. While navigating the complexities of grief, understanding funeral flower etiquette can be a thoughtful way to show respect and support.
If this person is more reserved and subdued, it’s best to stick with neutral colors such as earth tones of browns and greens. If you simply can’t decide, consider an arrangement of white lilies, one of the most common flowers to express your sympathy or condolences.
Also, worth consideration are xeranthemums, which represent eternity, or forget-me-nots, which can represent the memory of the deceased. Gladiolus also look beautiful in a fan-type arrangement, and chrysanthemums are always popular to send your sympathies.
The 5 stages of grief and how to cope
Oftentimes, someone who has lost a loved one feels shocked in the first couple of weeks after a death. It’s a surreal experience that almost seems like a dream at times. It’s important that friends and family members of the person who is grieving offer their support well after the funeral. Oftentimes, a person is in the first stage of the grieving process, which is denial and refusal to accept the reality that someone has died.
Over the next few months, or even years, a person will be going through various stages of grief, and this person will need your support now more than ever.
The second stage
Once a person has finally accepted that their loved one has died, they will move into the second stage of the grieving process, which is anger. During this phase, a person can become very mad and melancholy, and might become difficult to care for. It’s important to remember that this is a normal part of the process, and through time, the person will eventually move away from their anger and rage.
There’s no clear-cut timeline to how long a person will be in each stage of grief as everyone’s feelings and emotions will vary. Some people will find themselves grieving for years, while others will still feel a loss, but will be able to accept it and move on much quicker.
It’s also important to remember that those still living can be going through the grief over their own impending death. Someone who has been diagnosed with a terminal illness will find themselves going through the same process. Oftentimes, terminally ill patients find themselves bargaining with someone, anyone, to give them more time to experience life.
This can be extremely difficult for friends of the terminally ill, who want to help but don’t exactly know how. Again, a sweet and simple gesture of a colorful plant or beautiful flowers can be the pick-me-up your friend needs on that day.
Depression and confusion
The next stage of grief is depression, and your friend will need you more than ever. During this stage, a person will feel extremely sad and depressed and will wonder what the point of life is if everyone is going to die anyway. In this stage, the person grieving will oftentimes refuse visitors and phone calls and will become lonely and despondent.
Acceptance
On the other side of the depression stage is the final stage of acceptance. While a person might still feel quite sad, angry, and depressed, they have ultimately accepted the person’s death and realized that they need to go on living without their loved one. In their own way, they have come to terms with the death, and they are moving on from it. A terminally ill patient will also go through this stage and once they have accepted their own mortality, a peace of mind feeling comes with it and they feel much more at ease.
No matter what stage of grief a person is in, friends and family members who offer their unconditional support can help someone cope with their loss.
Again, flowers and plants can help you say, “I’m here for you” and “I want to help.”
